16.8 Lín sió-mōe lâi óa chia chhē un-jiû
I kā pháng chhiat hó, tiām-tiām chē leh. Hilda kám-kak tio̍h i ê tiām-chēng kap léng-tām ê le̍k-liōng, he Connie mā bat kám-kak kòe. Yi khòaⁿ i khòe tī toh-téng he bô tōa, bín-kám, pàng-sang ê chhiú. I m̄-sī kán-tan ê kang-lâng, i m̄-sī: i sī teh ián! teh ián!
"M̄-koh!" yi kóng, ná the̍h chi̍t sió tè ê chhiz. "Lí nā hām goán kóng phó͘-thong Eng-gí, mài kóng tē-hng khiuⁿ, ē khah chū-jiân."
I lia̍h yi khòaⁿ chi̍t-ē, kám-kak yi he ná mô͘-kúi ê ì-chì.
"Sī oh?" i iōng phó͘-thong Eng-gí kóng. "Sī án-ne oh? Lí hām góa tiong-kan só͘ kóng ê ōe ē chin chū-jiân sī-m̄? Tî-hui lí kóng, lí hi-bāng góa lo̍h tē-ga̍k, bián-tit lín sió-mōe koh kìⁿ góa: mā tî-hui góa koh kā lí ìn chi̍t-kóa pháiⁿ-thiaⁿ-ōe. Nā m̄-sī án-ne, iáu ū siáⁿ ē khah chū-jiân?"
"Oh, sī ah!" Hilda kóng. "Ū hó ê lé-sò͘ tō ē chin chū-jiân."
"He sī tē-jī thian-sèng, ē-sái án-ne kóng!" i kóng: jiân-āu i khai-sí chhiò. "Nái," i kóng. "Óa chiok thó-ià lé-sò͘. Hō͘ óa chò ka-kī lah!"
Hilda kám-kak chiâⁿ loān koh khì phut-phut. Chóng-sī, hoān-sè i boeh piáu-sī, i chai lâng teh tùi i hó-ì. I soah tian-tò iōng he poaⁿ-hì koh kek-tōa ê khì-sè, siūⁿ-kóng, sī i teh tùi lâng hó-ì. Ū-kàu kāu-bīn-phôe! Khó-liân ê Connie, bê-sit tī chit-lâng ê chiáng-ak!
Saⁿ ê lâng tiām-tiām teh chia̍h. Hilda chù-ì khòaⁿ hit-lâng ê iōng-chhan lé-chiat. Yi put-tek-put sêng-jīn, i pún-lêng tō pí yi ka-tī khah iu-ngá koh ko-sióng. Yi ū bó͘-chióng Scotland lâng ê pūn-chhiâng. Koh-kóng, i ū England lâng pún-sin tō ū ê chū-sìn, choân bô làu-khùi. Bô siáⁿ khó-lêng kā i pí lo̍h-khì.
M̄-koh i mā bô khó-lêng kā yi pí lo̍h-khì.
"Lí chin-chiàⁿ siūⁿ-kóng," yi kóng, kháu-khì ū khah un-hô, "he ta̍t-tit mō͘-hiám?"
"Siáⁿ ta̍t-tit mō͘-hiám?"
"Hām goán sió-mōe ê tāi-chì."
I hiàn-chhut bô chū-jiân ê khó͘-chhiò.
"Lír to̍h khìr mūi yi!"
Jiân-āu i khòaⁿ Connie.
"Sī lír ka-kī sim kam ì goān, ko͘-niû, káⁿ m̄-sī? Óa sī bô kiông-pek lír?"
Connie khòaⁿ Hilda.
"Góa hi-bāng lí m̄-thang tiau-kó͘-tóng, Hilda."
"Góa chiah bô tiau-kó͘-tóng. M̄-koh, chóng tio̍h siūⁿ khah chin. Lí ê seng-oa̍h ài ē-tàng ū liân-sòa. Lí m̄-thang kā tāi-chì kin-ká-kô."
Ū chi̍t-chūn ta̍k-ê lóng tiām-tiām.
"Eh, liân-sòa!" i kóng. "He sī sáⁿ ì-sù ah? Lír ê seng-oa̍h ê liân-sòa sī sáⁿ? Óa siūⁿ-kóng, lír tng-teh berh pān lī-hun. He ū sáⁿ liân-sòa? He put-kò sī lír kò͘-chip ê liân-sòa. Óa khòaⁿ sī án-ne. Liân-sòa tùi lír iū-koh ū sáⁿ hó-chhù? M̄-bián lōa-kú lír to̍h ē thó-ià lír ê liân-sòa. Lāu kó͘-tóng ê cha-bó͘ kap yi kò-jîn ê ì-chì: ái, chit nn̄g-hāng ha̍p khí-lâi to̍h sī chin hó ê liân-sòa, tio̍h lah! To-siā Thiⁿ-kong-peh, ka-chài bô góa ê tī-tāi, he sī lír ê tāi-chì!"
"Lí ū siáⁿ khoân-lī kap góa kóng hiah-ê ōe?" Hilda kóng.
"Khoân-lī! Lír ū sáⁿ khoân-lī ēng lír ê liân-sòa lâi sok-pa̍k lâng ah? Pàng pa̍t-lâng ê liân-sòa hō͘ in ka-kī khì lah."
"Hó hiaⁿ-tī ah, lí siūⁿ-kóng, góa teh koan-sim lí?" Hilda jiû-jiû kóng.
"Ái," i kóng. "Lír sī án-ne bô m̄-tio̍h. M̄-koán án-nóa, lír ē-sái kóng sī óa ê î-á."
"Chha chē leh, góa kā lí kóng."
"Bô chha lōa chē, óa kā lír kóng. Tī lír ê seng-oa̍h āu-piah, óa mā ū ka-kī ê liân-sòa. He bē khah su lír ê, m̄-koán tó chi̍t-kang. Nā sī kóng, lín sió-mōe lâi óa chia hēng kóe (cunt) koh chhē un-jiû, yi chai yi berh ài sáⁿ. Yi bat kap óa chiūⁿ-chhn̂g: che lír bô, kám-siā Sîn, sī in-ūi lír ê liân-sòa." Thêng chi̍t-khùn, I koh kóng: "... Eh, Óa bē kā khò͘-khang hiòng kha-chhng-āu. Nā tú-tio̍h hó-khang, óa ē kám-siā óa ê hēng-ūn chheⁿ. Chi̍t-ê cha-po͘ ū chia chit-ê súi ko͘-niû, chia̍h kah sóng-oaiⁿ-oaiⁿ, pí pa̍t-lâng ùi lír hia tit-tio̍h ê koh-khah chē. Bô-chhái ah, lír goân-pún ē-sái sī chi̍t-lia̍p hó lìngò, soah seⁿ-chò iá-lìngò, hó-khòaⁿ bô hó-chia̍h. Chhiūⁿ lír chit-khoán cha-bó͘ su-iàu hó-hó chiap-ki."
I iōng chi̍t-chióng sió-khóa bah-kám koh him-sióng ê koài chhiò khòaⁿ yi.
“Chhiūⁿ lí chit-khoán lâng," yi kóng, "ài koaiⁿ khí-lâi: thang-hó chhù-hoa̍t in chho͘-ló͘ koh chū-su ê sèng-io̍k."
"Ái, hu-jîn ah! Ka-chài sè-kài iáu ū óa chit-khoán lâng. M̄-koh, bô lâng berh chhap lír, lír che sī eng-kai."
Hilda í-keng khiā khí-lâi, kiâⁿ kàu mn̂g piⁿ. I mā khiā khí-lâi, the̍h tiàu tio̍h ê gōa-thò.
"Góa ē-tàng ka-tī chhōe lō͘ khì," yi kóng.
"Óa siūⁿ lír bē-tàng," i sūn-chhùi kā ìn.
In koh pâi hó-chhiò ê lō͘-tūi, tiām-tiām kiâⁿ sió-lō͘. Iáu sī ū chi̍t-chiah niau-thâu-chiáu teh kiò. I hūn bē-tit kā tōaⁿ--sí.
--
16.8 恁小妹來 óa 遮 chhē 溫柔
伊 kā pháng 切好, 恬恬坐 leh. Hilda 感覺著伊 ê 恬靜 kap 冷淡 ê 力量, 彼 Connie mā bat 感覺過. 她看伊 khòe tī 桌頂彼無大, 敏感, 放鬆 ê 手. 伊毋是簡單 ê 工人, 伊毋是: 伊是 teh 演! teh 演!
"M̄-koh!" 她講, ná 提一小塊 ê chhiz. "你若和阮講普通英語, 莫講地方腔, 會較自然."
伊掠她看一下, 感覺她彼 ná 魔鬼 ê 意志.
"是 oh?" 伊用普通英語講. "是 án-ne oh? 你和我中間所講 ê 話會真自然是毋? 除非你講, 你希望我落地獄, 免得恁小妹 koh 見我: mā 除非我 koh kā 你應一寡歹聽話. 若毋是 án-ne, 猶有啥會較自然?"
"Oh, 是 ah!" Hilda 講. "有好 ê 禮數 tō 會真自然."
"彼是第二天性, 會使 án-ne 講!" 伊講: 然後伊開始笑. "Nái," 伊講. "Óa 足討厭禮數. 予 óa 做 ka-kī lah!"
Hilda 感覺誠亂 koh 氣 phut-phut. 總是, 凡勢伊欲表示, 伊知人 teh 對伊好意. 伊煞顛倒用彼搬戲 koh 激大 ê 氣勢, 想講, 是伊 teh 對人好意. 有夠厚面皮! 可憐 ê Connie, 迷失 tī 這人 ê 掌握!
三个人恬恬 teh 食. Hilda 注意看彼人 ê 用餐禮節. 她不得不承認, 伊本能 tō 比她家己較優雅 koh 高尚. 她有某種 Scotland 人 ê 笨 chhiâng. Koh 講, 伊有 England 人本身 tō 有 ê 自信, 全無 làu 氣. 無啥可能 kā 伊比落去.
M̄-koh 伊 mā 無可能 kā 她比落去.
"你真正想講," 她講, 口氣有較溫和, "彼值得冒險?"
"啥值得冒險?"
"和阮小妹 ê 代誌."
伊現出無自然 ê 苦笑.
"Lír to̍h khìr mūi 她!"
然後伊看 Connie.
"是 lír ka-kī 心甘意願, 姑娘, káⁿ 毋是? Óa 是無強迫 lír?"
Connie 看 Hilda.
"我希望你毋通刁古董, Hilda."
"我才無刁古董. M̄-koh, 總著想較真. 你 ê 生活愛會當有連紲. 你毋通 kā 代誌 kin-ká-kô."
有一陣逐个攏恬恬.
"Eh, 連紲!" 伊講. "彼是 sáⁿ 意思 ah? Lír ê 生活 ê 連紲是 sáⁿ? Óa 想講, lír tng-teh berh 辦離婚. 彼有 sáⁿ 連紲? 彼不過是 lír 固執 ê 連紲. Óa 看是 án-ne. 連紲對 lír 又 koh 有 sáⁿ 好處? 毋免 lōa 久 lír to̍h 會討厭 lír ê 連紲. 老古董 ê 查某 kap 她個人 ê 意志: ái, 這兩項合起來 to̍h 是真好 ê 連紲, 著 lah! 多謝天公伯, 佳哉無我 ê tī-tāi, 彼是 lír ê 代誌!"
"你有啥權利 kap 我講 hiah-ê 話?" Hilda 講.
"權利! Lír 有 sáⁿ 權利 ēng lír ê 連紲來束縛人 ah? 放別人 ê 連紲予 in ka-kī 去 lah."
"好兄弟 ah, 你想講, 我 teh 關心你?" Hilda 柔柔講.
"Ái," 伊講. "Lír 是 án-ne 無毋著. 毋管 án-nóa, lír 會使講是 óa ê 姨仔."
"差濟 leh, 我 kā 你講."
"無差 lōa 濟, óa kā lír 講. Tī lír ê 生活後壁, óa mā 有 ka-kī ê 連紲. 彼袂較輸 lír ê, 毋管佗一工. 若是講, 恁小妹來 óa 遮 hēng 粿 (cunt) koh chhē 溫柔, 她知她 berh 愛 sáⁿ. 她 bat kap óa 上床: 這 lír 無, 感謝神, 是因為 lír ê 連紲." 停一睏, 伊 koh 講: "... Eh, Óa 袂 kā 褲空向尻川後. 若拄著好空, óa 會感謝 óa ê 幸運星. 一个查埔有遮這个媠姑娘, 食 kah 爽 oaiⁿ-oaiⁿ, 比別人 ùi lír 遐得著 ê koh 較濟. 無彩 ah, lír 原本會使是一粒好 lìngò, 煞生做野 lìngò, 好看無好食. 像 lír 這款查某需要好好接枝."
伊用一種小可肉感 koh 欣賞 ê 怪笑看她.
“像你這款人," 她講, "愛關起來: 通好處罰 in 粗魯 koh 自私 ê 性慾."
"Ái, 夫人 ah! 佳哉世界猶有 óa 這款人. M̄-koh, 無人berh chhap lír, lír 這是應該."
Hilda 已經徛起來, 行到門邊. 伊 mā 徛起來, 提吊著 ê 外套.
"我會當家己揣路去," 她講.
"Óa 想 lír 袂當," 伊順喙 kā 應.
In koh 排好笑 ê 路隊, 恬恬行小路. 猶是有一隻貓頭鳥 teh 叫. 伊恨袂得 kā 彈死.
--
16.8
He cut the bread, then sat motionless. Hilda felt, as Connie once used to, his power of silence and distance. She saw his smallish, sensitive, loose hand on the table. He was no simple working man, not he: he was acting! acting!
’Still!’ she said, as she took a little cheese. ‘It would be more natural if you spoke to us in normal English, not in vernacular.’
He looked at her, feeling her devil of a will.
’Would it?’ he said in the normal English. ‘Would it? Would anything that was said between you and me be quite natural, unless you said you wished me to hell before your sister ever saw me again: and unless I said something almost as unpleasant back again? Would anything else be natural?’
’Oh yes!’ said Hilda. ‘Just good manners would be quite natural.’
’Second nature, so to speak!’ he said: then he began to laugh. ‘Nay,’ he said. ‘I’m weary o’ manners. Let me be!’
Hilda was frankly baffled and furiously annoyed. After all, he might show that he realized he was being honoured. Instead of which, with his play-acting and lordly airs, he seemed to think it was he who was conferring the honour. Just impudence! Poor misguided Connie, in the man’s clutches!
The three ate in silence. Hilda looked to see what his table-manners were like. She could not help realizing that he was instinctively much more delicate and well-bred than herself. She had a certain Scottish clumsiness. And moreover, he had all the quiet self-contained assurance of the English, no loose edges. It would be very difficult to get the better of him.
But neither would he get the better of her.
’And do you really think,’ she said, a little more humanly, ‘it’s worth the risk.’
’Is what worth what risk?’
’This escapade with my sister.’
He flickered his irritating grin.
’Yo’ maun ax ‘er!’
Then he looked at Connie.
’Tha comes o’ thine own accord, lass, doesn’t ter? It’s non me as forces thee?’
Connie looked at Hilda.
’I wish you wouldn’t cavil, Hilda.’
’Naturally I don’t want to. But someone has to think about things. You’ve got to have some sort of continuity in your life. You can’t just go making a mess.’
There was a moment’s pause.
’Eh, continuity!’ he said. ‘An’ what by that? What continuity ave yer got i’ YOUR life? I thought you was gettin’ divorced. What continuity’s that? Continuity o’ yer own stubbornness. I can see that much. An’ what good’s it goin’ to do yer? You’ll be sick o’ yer continuity afore yer a fat sight older. A stubborn woman an er own self-will: ay, they make a fast continuity, they do. Thank heaven, it isn’t me as ‘as got th’ ‘andlin’ of yer!’
’What right have you to speak like that to me?’ said Hilda.
’Right! What right ha’ yo’ ter start harnessin’ other folks i’ your continuity? Leave folks to their own continuities.’
’My dear man, do you think I am concerned with you?’ said Hilda softly.
’Ay,’ he said. ‘Yo’ are. For it’s a force-put. Yo’ more or less my sister-in-law.’
’Still far from it, I assure you.’
’Not a’ that far, I assure YOU. I’ve got my own sort o’ continuity, back your life! Good as yours, any day. An’ if your sister there comes ter me for a bit o’ cunt an’ tenderness, she knows what she’s after. She’s been in my bed afore: which you ‘aven’t, thank the Lord, with your continuity.’ There was a dead pause, before he added: ‘—Eh, I don’t wear me breeches arse-forrards. An’ if I get a windfall, I thank my stars. A man gets a lot of enjoyment out o’ that lass theer, which is more than anybody gets out o’ th’ likes o’ you. Which is a pity, for you might appen a’ bin a good apple, ‘stead of a handsome crab. Women like you needs proper graftin’.’
He was looking at her with an odd, flickering smile, faintly sensual and appreciative.
’And men like you,’ she said, ‘ought to be segregated: justifying their own vulgarity and selfish lust.’
’Ay, ma’am! It’s a mercy there’s a few men left like me. But you deserve what you get: to be left severely alone.’
Hilda had risen and gone to the door. He rose and took his coat from the peg.
’I can find my way quite well alone,’ she said.
’I doubt you can’t,’ he replied easily.
They tramped in ridiculous file down the lane again, in silence. An owl still hooted. He knew he ought to shoot it.
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