Wednesday, September 16, 2020

13.2 逐尾蟲揣伊家己 ê 食物

13.2 Ta̍k bóe thâng chhōe i ka-tī ê si̍t-bu̍t
In gia̍h ba̍k khòaⁿ chhián soaⁿ-kok hia ê khòng-tiûⁿ, hām koh kòe hit-pêng Tevershall kui-lō͘ khàm o͘-kòa ê chhù, ná-chhiūⁿ bó͘-chióng chôa teh peh soaⁿ-phiâⁿ. Cheng-siaⁿ ùi àm-âng-sek ê kàu-tn̂g hiáng-khí: lé-pài, lé-pài, lé-pài!
"M̄-koh, kang-lâng khéng hō͘ lí án-ne an-pâi bô?" yi kóng.
"Chhin-ài ê, chí-iàu chhiú-tōaⁿ un-hô, in tio̍h chiap-siū."
"Kám m̄-sī ài ū hō͘-siong ê lí-kái?"
"Bô m̄-tio̍h: ài hō͘ in chai, seng ū sán-gia̍p, chiah ū kò-jîn."
"M̄-koh, lí kám tio̍h chiàm-ū chit-ê sán-gia̍p" yi kóng.
"Góa bô su-iàu. M̄-koh tī bó͘-chióng thêng-tō͘, góa khak-si̍t chiàm-ū he. Chit-má sán-gia̍p só͘-iú-khoân í-keng sī chi̍t-ê chong-kàu ê būn-tê: chū Iâ-so͘ kap Sèng Francis í-lâi tō sī án-ne. Tiōng-tiám m̄-sī: kā lí só͘-ū-ê sàng hō͘ sàn-chhiah-lâng, jî-sī iōng lí só͘-ū-ê khì hoat-tián kang-gia̍p, hō͘ sàn-chhiah-lâng ū khang-khòe. Kan-ta án-ne chiah ē-tàng chhī-pá só͘-ū ê chhùi kap chhēng-sio só͘-ū ê sin-khu. Kā lán só͘-ū-ê hō͘ sàn-chhiah-lâng, ē iau-sí sàn-chhiah-lâng kap lán ka-tī. Ki-hng ê sè-kài m̄-sī hó ê bo̍k-piau. Sīm-chì phó͘-phiàn ê sàn-chhiah mā bô hó-sńg. Sàn-chhiah chin bái."
"M̄-koh, bô kong-pêng boeh án-chóaⁿ?"
"He sī miā. Sī án-chóaⁿ Bo̍k-chheⁿ pí Hái-ông-chheⁿ khah tōa? Lán bô hoat-tō͘ kái-piàn miā-ūn ê an-pâi!"
"M̄-koh, him-siān, ba̍k-chhiah, kap put-boán nā khai-sí chhut-hiān," yi koh kóng.
"Tio̍h ài kín-kín kā ah-lo̍h. Chóng-sī ū lâng ē chò thâu."
"M̄-koh siáng boeh chò thâu?" yi mn̄g.
"Chiàm-ū koh keng-êng kang-gia̍p ê lâng lah."
Chi̍t-chūn sî-kan nn̄g-lâng lóng tiām-tiām.
"Chāi góa khòaⁿ, in m̄-sī hó thâu-ke," yi kóng.
"Nā-bô, in tio̍h án-chóaⁿ chò?"
"In bô jīn-chin chò hó thâu-ke ê kak-sek," yi kóng.
"In chò thâu-ke khah jīn-chin kòe lí teh chò hu-jîn neh," i kóng.
"He sī lâng kiông hō͘ góa ê. Góa si̍t-chāi bô ài che," yi pok chi̍t-kù. I kā chhia-á thêng lo̍h, khòaⁿ yi.
"Taⁿ sī siáng teh siám in ê chek-jīm ah!" i kóng. "Sī siáng taⁿ siūⁿ boeh ùi lí só͘ kóng ê kak-sek siám-khui hit-ê chek-jīm ah?"
"M̄-koh, góa bô ài siáⁿ kak-sek," yi khòng-gī.
"Ah! Án-ne tō sī teh siám. Lí í-keng ū ah, chù-tiāⁿ ū ah. Lí tio̍h chiap-siū i. Sī siáng hō͘ thòaⁿ-kang só͘-ū ê hiah-ê hó-chhù: in ê chèng-tī chū-iû, in ê kàu-io̍k, in ê ūi-seng tiâu-kiāⁿ, in ê kiān-khong, in ê chheh, in ê im-ga̍k, it-chhè ê it-chhè. Sī siáng hō͘ in ê? Kám sī thòaⁿ-kang hō͘ thòaⁿ-kang ê? M̄-sī! Lóng sī kui England ê Wragby hām Shipleys chīn pún-hūn hō͘ in ê, mā tio̍h kè-sio̍k hō͘ in. Che tō sī lí ê chek-jīm."
Connie thiaⁿ i kóng, khì kah bīn âng-kì-kì.
"Góa ū boeh hō͘ lâng mi̍h-kiāⁿ," yi kóng. "M̄-koh lâng m̄ ín-chún góa. Chit-má ta̍k-hāng lóng boeh bē, tio̍h iōng bé ê, Wragby hām Shipley bē mi̍h-kiāⁿ hō͘ lâng, lī-sûn chin koân. Ta̍k-hāng lóng teh bē. Lín bô chi̍t-tiám-á chin-chiàⁿ ê tông-chêng-sim. Koh-kóng, sī siáng the̍h khì kang-lâng ê thian-jiân seng-oa̍h kap jîn-sèng, kā in chah-lâi chit-chióng kang-gia̍p ê khióng-pò͘? Che sī sáng chò lâi ê?"
"Án-ne, góa tio̍h án-chóaⁿ chò?" i kóng, bīn chheⁿ sún-sún. "Kiò in lâi chhù chhiúⁿ-kiap sioh?"
"Sī án-chóaⁿ Tevershall hiah bái, hiah thó-lâng-ià? Sī án-chóaⁿ in ê seng-oa̍h hiah bô-bāng?"
"In kiàn-siat in ka-tī ê Tevershall, he sī in chū-iû piáu-hiān ê chi̍t pō͘-hūn. In kiàn-siat ka-tī bí-lē ê Tevershall, in kòe in ka-tī ê bí-miāu seng-oa̍h. Góa bô khó-lêng thè in kòe seng-oa̍h. Ta̍k-bóe thâng tio̍h ài kòe i ka-tī ê seng-oa̍h."
"M̄-koh lí kiò in ūi lí kang-chok. In kòe ê sī lí ê thòaⁿ-khòng ê seng-oa̍h."
"Kin-pún m̄-sī. Ta̍k-bóe chhōe i ka-tī ê si̍t-bu̍t. Bô chi̍t-ê lâng sī góa ah i lâi ūi góa kang-chok ê."
"In kòe kang-gia̍p-hòa ê seng-oa̍h, sī bô-bāng ê, lán ê mā kāng-khoán." yi kiò chhut-lâi.
"Góa siūⁿ m̄-sī án-ne. He chí sī romantik ê kóng-hoat, sī hi-jio̍k koh boeh-sí ê romantik chú-gī ê mi̍h-kiāⁿ. Lí kin-pún to bô sêng chi̍t-ê bô-bāng ê lâng khiā tī hia, góa chhin-ài ê Connie."
Che sī chin ê. In-ūi yi chhim-nâ ê ba̍k-chiu teh hoat-kng, nn̄g-pêng chhùi-phé âng-gê, yi khòaⁿ khí-lâi chhiong-móa hoán-poān ê jia̍t-chêng, kin-pún m̄-sī choa̍t-bōng ê ut-chut. Yi chù-ì tio̍h, tī chháu-chhok ê só͘-chāi, ū sin hoat ê n̂g-hoe-káu-lûn-chháu (黃花九輪草, cowslip) tiām-tiām khiā leh, piáu-bīn iáu ū jiông-jiông ê mo͘. Yi put-ho̍k koh kî-koài, bêng-bêng kám-kak Clifford m̄-tio̍h, sī án-chóaⁿ yi bô hoat-tō͘ kā kóng, bô hoat-tō͘ kóng-chhut i sī tó-ūi m̄-tio̍h.
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13.2 逐尾蟲揣伊家己 ê 食物
In 攑目看淺山谷遐 ê 礦場, koh 過彼爿 Tevershall 規路崁烏蓋 ê , ná 像某種蛇 teh peh 山坪. 鐘聲 ùi 暗紅色 ê 教堂響起: 禮拜, 禮拜, 禮拜!
"M̄-koh, 工人肯予你 án-ne 安排無?" 她講.
"親愛 ê, 只要手段溫和, in 著接受."
"敢毋是愛有互相 ê 理解?"
"無毋著: 愛予 in , 先有產業, 才有個人."
"M̄-koh, 你敢著佔有這个產業" 她講.
"我無需要. M̄-koh tī 某種程度, 我確實佔有彼. Chit-má 產業所有權已經是一个宗教 ê 問題: 自耶穌 kap Francis 以來 án-ne. 重點毋是: kā 你所有 ê 送予散赤人, 而是用你所有 ê 去發展工業, 予散赤人有 khang-khòe. 干焦 án-ne 才會當飼飽所有 ê kap 穿燒所有 ê 身軀. Kā 咱所有 ê 予散赤人, iau 死散赤人 kap 咱家己. 飢荒 ê 世界毋是好 ê 目標. 甚至普遍 ê 散赤 無好耍. 散赤真䆀."
"M̄-koh, 無公平欲按怎?"
"彼是命. 是按怎木星比海王星較大? 咱無法度改變命運 ê 安排!"
"M̄-koh, 欣羨, 目赤, kap 不滿若開始出現," koh .
"著愛緊緊 壓落. 總是有人會做頭."
"M̄-koh siáng 欲做頭?" 她問.
"佔有 koh 經營工業 ê lah."
一陣時間兩人攏恬恬.
"在我看, in 毋是好頭家," 她講.
"若無, in 著按怎做?"
"In 無認真做好頭家 ê 角色," 她講.
"In 做頭家較認真過你 teh 做夫人 neh," 伊講.
"彼是人強予我 ê. 我實在無愛這," 她暴一句. 車仔停落, 看她.
"今是 siáng teh in ê 責任 ah!" 伊講. "siáng 今想欲 ùi 你所講 ê 角色閃開彼个責任 ah?"
"M̄-koh, 我無愛啥角色," 她抗議.
"Ah! Án-ne tō teh . 你已經有 ah, 註定有 ah. 你著接受伊. siáng 予炭工所有 ê hiah-ê 好處: in ê 政治自由, in ê 教育, in ê 衛生條件, in ê 健康, in ê , in ê 音樂, 一切 ê 一切. siáng in ê? 敢是炭工予炭工 ê? 毋是! 攏是規 England ê Wragby Shipleys 盡本份予 in ê, mā 著繼續予 in. 是你 ê 責任."
Connie 聽伊講, kah 面紅 kì-kì.
"我有欲予人物件," 她講. "M̄-koh 人毋允准我. Chit-má 逐項攏欲賣, 著用買 ê, Wragby Shipley 賣物件予人, 利純真懸. 逐項攏 teh . 恁無一點仔真正 ê 同情心. Koh , siáng 提去工人 ê 天然生活 kap 人性, kā in 扎來這種工業 ê 恐怖? 這是 sáng 做來 ê?"
"Án-ne, 我著按怎做?" 伊講, 面青 sún-sún. "in 來厝搶劫 sioh?"
"是按怎 Tevershall hiah , hiah 討人厭? 是按怎 in ê 生活 hiah 無望?"
"In 建設 in 家己 ê Tevershall, 彼是 in 自由表現 ê 一部份. In 建設家己美麗 ê Tevershall, in in 家己 ê 美妙生活. 我無可能替 in 過生活. 逐尾蟲著愛過伊家己 ê 生活."
"M̄-koh 你叫 in 為你工作. In ê 是你 ê 炭礦 ê 生活."
"根本毋是. 逐尾揣伊家己 ê 食物. 無一个人是我押伊來為我工作 ê."
"In 過工業化 ê 生活, 是無望 ê, ê mā 仝款." 她叫出來.
"我想毋是 án-ne. 彼只是 romantik ê 講法, 是虛弱 koh 欲死 ê romantik 主義 ê 物件. 你根本都無成一个無望 ê 人徛 , 我親愛 ê Connie."
這是真 ê. 因為她深藍 ê 目睭 teh 發光, 兩爿喙䫌紅牙, 她看起來充滿反叛 ê 熱情, 根本毋是絕望 ê 鬱卒. 她注意著, tī 草簇 ê 所在, 有新發 ê n̂g-hoe-káu-lûn-chháu (黃花九輪草, cowslip) 恬恬徛 leh, 表面猶有絨絨 ê . 她不服 koh 奇怪, 明明感覺 Clifford 毋著, 是按怎她無法度 , 無法度講出伊是佗位毋著.
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13.2
They looked up the shallow valley at the mine, and beyond it, at the black-lidded houses of Tevershall crawling like some serpent up the hill. From the old brown church the bells were ringing: Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!
’But will the men let you dictate terms?’ she said.
‘My dear, they will have to: if one does it gently.’
’But mightn’t there be a mutual understanding?’
’Absolutely: when they realize that the industry comes before the individual.’
’But must you own the industry?’ she said.
’I don’t. But to the extent I do own it, yes, most decidedly. The ownership of property has now become a religious question: as it has been since Jesus and St Francis. The point is NOT: take all thou hast and give to the poor, but use all thou hast to encourage the industry and give work to the poor. It’s the only way to feed all the mouths and clothe all the bodies. Giving away all we have to the poor spells starvation for the poor just as much as for us. And universal starvation is no high aim. Even general poverty is no lovely thing. Poverty is ugly.’
’But the disparity?’
’That is fate. Why is the star Jupiter bigger than the star Neptune? You can’t start altering the make-up of things!’
’But when this envy and jealousy and discontent has once started,’ she began.
’Do your best to stop it. Somebody’s GOT to be boss of the show.’
’But who is boss of the show?’ she asked.
’The men who own and run the industries.’
There was a long silence.
’It seems to me they’re a bad boss,’ she said.
’Then you suggest what they should do.’
’They don’t take their boss-ship seriously enough,’ she said.
’They take it far more seriously than you take your lady ship,’ he said.
’That’s thrust upon me. I don’t really want it,’ she blurted out. He stopped the chair and looked at her.
’Who’s shirking their responsibility now!’ he said. ‘Who is trying to get away NOW from the responsibility of their own boss-ship, as you call it?’
’But I don’t want any boss-ship,’ she protested.
’Ah! But that is funk. You’ve got it: fated to it. And you should live up to it. Who has given the colliers all they have that’s worth having: all their political liberty, and their education, such as it is, their sanitation, their health-conditions, their books, their music, everything. Who has given it them? Have colliers given it to colliers? No! All the Wrag- bys and Shipleys in England have given their part, and must go on giving. There’s your responsibility.’
Connie listened, and flushed very red.
’I’d like to give something,’ she said. ‘But I’m not allowed. Everything is to be sold and paid for now; and all the things you mention now, Wragby and Shipley SELLS them to the people, at a good prof it. Everything is sold. You don’t give one heart-beat of real sympathy. And besides, who has taken away from the people their natural life and manhood, and given them this industrial horror? Who has done that?’
’And what must I do?’ he asked, green. ‘Ask them to come and pillage me?’
’Why is Tevershall so ugly, so hideous? Why are their lives so hopeless?’
’They built their own Tevershall, that’s part of their display of freedom. They built themselves their pretty Tevershall, and they live their own pretty lives. I can’t live their lives for them. Every beetle must live its own life.’
’But you make them work for you. They live the life of your coal-mine.’
’Not at all. Every beetle finds its own food. Not one man is forced to work for me."
’Their lives are industrialized and hopeless, and so are ours,’ she cried.
’I don’t think they are. That’s just a romantic figure of speech, a relic of the swooning and die-away romanticism. You don’t look at all a hopeless figure standing there, Connie my dear.’
Which was true. For her dark-blue eyes were flashing, her colour was hot in her cheeks, she looked full of a rebellious passion far from the dejection of hopelessness. She noticed, in the tussocky places of the grass, cottony young cowslips standing up still bleared in their down. And she wondered with rage, why it was she felt Clifford was so WRONG, yet she couldn’t say it to him, she could not say exactly WHERE he was wrong.
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